


What I like about you baby, is how you annoy me daily

by hopeful_insomniac



Category: Night at the Museum (Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Bondage, I’m going to hell, M/M, NatM - Freeform, Plot What Plot, Porn Without Plot, Smut, Smut and Fluff, actual sin, soft boyfriends, this is my first fic on AO3 pls don’t kill me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2019-05-29
Packaged: 2020-03-26 18:08:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19011100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopeful_insomniac/pseuds/hopeful_insomniac
Summary: Jed decides to try something new.





	What I like about you baby, is how you annoy me daily

**Author's Note:**

> I got sucked into this fandom a few weeks ago, and I obviously had to make a fic about my two favorite boys.  
> All mistakes are my own, and constructive critism is very welcome :)

“Octavius!” Jedediah yelled from his diorama. He had been missing the general, and as soon as the sun had set, he was ready to blow off some steam.  
“My love!” The roman yelled back, already hopping down from his home and heading towards the Old West.  
As soon as Octavius reached the cowboy’s home, he quickly climbed up to meet his lover.  
“Hey Octy...” Jedediah smiled at Octavius. The brunette smiled back, before asking, “what did you call me for?”  
“What, a man ain’t allowed to see his partner?” The blonde shot back with no bite. Octavius grinned, used to his boyfriend’s antics.  
“So what would you like to do tonight, my dear?”  
Jed scrunched his forehead in thought.  
“Well, how ‘bout we play some fetch with Rexy?”  
“Alright, I shall ask Larry to retrieve the car for us.”  
A few minutes later, the night watchman himself (accompanied by Ahkmenrah) placed the small car onto the floor for the pair.  
“Thank you, my liege.” Octavius said, and Larry nodded, before walking away.  
“Octy, were Gigantor and Ahk holding hands?” Jedediah asked, a shit eating grin plastered all over his face.  
Octavius cocked his head. Come to think of it, they were awfully close.  
He replied honestly, “I do not know.”  
“Heh.” Jedediah smirked, making appreciative glances at Octavius‘ body.  
Thankfully, the Roman general didn’t notice. He was too busy clambering down towards the car, eager to play fetch with Rexy. The blonde sighed, before doing the same.

 

* * *

  
It was a few hours later, around 1 in the morning. The pair had just finished a long game of fetch with Rexy, and were both pretty tired.  
In the diorama room, the artificial sun was beginning to set down in the Roman’s home. Quickly, Octavius pulled Jedediah towards it, hopping up to the top in two bounds.  
The cowboy did the same, before meeting his boyfriend at the ledge of the diorama.  
Octavius pressed a palm up against his cheek, tracing his jaw carefully with his fingers. The cowboy nuzzled into the touch, relishing the feeling of those familiar callused fingers rubbing him in the most exquisite way.  
And hopefully in other places too.  
Like any normal being, Jedediah Smith had needs. A hot, tanned Roman with doe eyes and a body from heaven? Well, it was enough to make his body tingle in the best way possible.  
Octavius noticed this, and pressed a tender kiss just behind the blonde’s ear.  
Jed shivered.  
“You want me, my love?” The general asked, moving his body closer to Jedediah’s.  
The cowboy honest-to-god groaned.  
“Mm.. yeah..”  
“I have lubricant in my quarter.” Octavius whispered, and Jedediah leaped up.  
“Then what are we waitin’ for?”

 

* * *

  
When the pair finally reached the bedroom, Octavius frantically closed the door behind them, before capturing Jedediah’s mouth in an absolutely filthy kiss.  
Gradually, they made their way to the bed, which proved to be difficult considering the fact that they refused to stop kissing.  
“I have been wanting to couple you all night.” Octavius admitted frantically, before Jedediah shut him up with another fierce snogging session.  
Once they pulled apart, Octavius began the tedious task of taking his armor off. This part was the most annoying part of making love, he thought. While doing it with Jedediah was always pleasurable, it annoyed him that he had to take off unnecessary amounts of armor.  
Meanwhile, Jedediah waited on the bed, his blue eyes gleaming with hunger for his boyfriend’s body. He trailed his hands down to his pants, before fiddling with the belt and popping it open. Finally, the cowboy was able to stroke himself, watching as more and more of Octavius’ body was revealed.  
Said man peeled off the last of his armor, standing in nothing but his tunic at long last. He shot a dirty look at Jedediah, who had continued to masturbate.  
“My love, I should be the one pleasuring you.” Octavius said, a slight whine laced into his tone.  
Jed shrugged apologetically, still stroking himself.  
“Sorry Ockie, I just need ya.”  
And with that, he pounced.  
Octavius yelped as his partner dragged him to the bed, hurriedly unbuckling and pulling down his own pants and shirt, and tossing them to the side, along with his hat.  
“W-What are you doing Diah?” The Roman whimpered as Jedediah began to move their hips together.  
“I’m taking what I want.” He replied in an animalistic growl.  
If Octavius could be any harder, he would probably be frozen from the waist down.  
Jedediah grinned his signature grin, blue eyes sparkling in the dim light.  
“Now, where’s the slick?” He asked, still seated on his boyfriend’s lap. Octavius made a gesture towards the bedside table, and Jedediah grabbed the bottle in a flash.  
Suddenly, he got up and walked into the other room in the private quarters, leaving Octavius turned on and confused.  
He returned several minutes later, holding some sort of leather rope.  
The cowboy gave his partner a long, hot kiss, before explaining, “I’m back darlin’, just had to prep and get what I needed.”  
“Okay. What are the ropes for, my love?” Octavius asked, and Jed’s face transformed into his usual mischievous expression.  
“Oh, just a lil’ something for tonight. I wanted to try something new with ya’, that’s all.” Jedediah grinned, before slowly stripping Octavius of his tunic.  
Once the pair were both naked, the blonde wasted no time in pushing Octavius back up against the headboard, before tying both of his hands to the bedposts.  
The brunette yelped. “What are you doing?”  
“I just wanna try something, m’kay? If ya don’t like it, we can stop, you just say the word.”  
“O-okay.”  
With that consent spurring him on, Jedediah uncapped the (very small) bottle of lube. It had been quite embarrassing to ask Larry for it, but the man had simply smiled and congratulated him on dating Octavius. Apparently, homosexuality was less taboo now then it was back when he was really alive.  
Octavius’ impatient whines brought him back to the present.  
Jedediah slicked up two fingers, before pressing them up to his own entrance. With his other hand, he slicked up Octavius’ cock, covering it in lube. The Roman general groaned, and subconsciously began to rut lazily into his hand. Jed just grinned and continued to stroke, one finger deep inside his own body.  
One began two, and slowly but surely, two became four. Finally, when neither of them could take the teasing anymore, the blonde positioned himself, hovering over Octavius’ waiting dick.  
“You ready?”  
Octavius groaned. “Gods yes, just put it in already!”  
Jed smirked. “Yes general.” And with that, he took Octavius’ member inside of him with one smooth movement.  
Slowly but surely, Jedediah began to ride his boyfriend’s cock, rolling his hips in a lazy, soothing manner. Octavius moaned, tugging at the ropes.  
“Feels good?” The cowboy teased, and the Roman straight up growled.  
Taking that as a yes, Jedediah sped up a bit, rocking faster. He moved his face down to be parallel to Octavius’, kissing him softly.  
The pair continued to rock in a carnal rhythm, both of them temporarily satisfied.  
Well, maybe just one of them.  
Octavius wanted nothing more then to rip out of those damned ropes, slam Jedediah to the bed, and make passionate, rough, proper love to him. However, said male seemed pretty content just lazily riding his cock.  
The final straw came when Jed leaned in real close and whispered, “how do ya feel, Ockie? Want to pound into me?”  
“Oh, gods, YES.”  
And with that, Octavius wiggled out of his restraints, pushed Jedediah up against him doggy style, and slammed into him, hitting his favorite spot.  
Jedediah let out a long, loud moan that could probably be heard throughout the entire museum. However, Octavius was too preoccupied with the man in front of him to really care.  
Jedediah squealed and grabbed the sheets, pleasure surging through him with every rough snap of his boyfriend’s hips. He felt those lovely, rough hands coming up to grab his waist, and he almost cried.  
Octavius was his, and here he was, touching him and loving him, and oh god, so good, don’t ever stop-  
“Darling- I can’t- I have to-“  
“Me... me too! Come with me, Ok-Ah! Okie...”  
Jedediah grabbed his partner’s hand, interlacing their fingers as the pleasure got more and more intense, and the fire in his stomach burned more and more and fuck, They can’t hold on anymore...  
“OCTAVIUS! Oh god!”  
“Jed... JEDEDIAH!”  
And he’s coming, he’s coming all over himself and Octavius is coming inside him, and it’s hot and burning and oh so wonderful, he wouldn’t trade it for anything right now.  
It’s a good 20 seconds before they both get their bearings again. Octavius slips out of Jedediah, before hurrying off to the bathroom.  
The blonde collapses onto the bed, breathing heavily.  
It seems like ages when Octavius finally comes back, his wrists now free of leather and his gaze soft.  
He holds a wet cloth, and Jedediah flips over, allowing him to clean gently. Octavius makes a pleased noise when they are both clean, because it means that they can get to the best part: post coital cuddling.  
Jedediah allows Octavius to curl around him. Normally, they argue about who gets to be big spoon, but tonight they are both so blissed out that it doesn’t really matter.  
Neither of them say anything, for fear of breaking the tranquil atmosphere.  
It is Jedediah who talks first.  
“Heh, you tuckered me out real good, huh ‘Tavy?”  
Octavius makes an amused snort, and Jedediah can feel a smile begin to form on the Roman’s lips.  
“Me, get you to rest? We all know that is simply impossible, my darling one.” He shoots back, placing a gentle kiss in the cowboy’s fluffy blonde hair.  
“You are an inexhaustible source of sexual energy.” The general continued, snuggling closer. Jedediah smirked, and pressed back against him.  
Octavius laughed gently, and exhaled long and slow.  
Outside the Museum, the sun began to rise, casting soft yellow light through the windows.  
“Good morning, my darling Jedediah.”  
“Good morning, Ockie.”  
And then they freeze.


End file.
